How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
