The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
