ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
