Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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