"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Randomize
