the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
