Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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