"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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