theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize