Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Randomize
