Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
