I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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