i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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