the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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