You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
