She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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