maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
