ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
