you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Holy sore nipples Batman
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
