My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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