No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
