Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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