So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
