singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I showed him my bush... on skype.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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