I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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