apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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