Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
