May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
