If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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