I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
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