Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
