he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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