ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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