you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize