dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
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