What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
