I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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