can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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