is wine microwaveable?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize