rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Randomize
