So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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