i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Randomize
