I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
this just has baby written all over it
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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