I bet he comes in French.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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