I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
did you just send me my own nude
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
