everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
