She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
