I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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