if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
this will be a night to untag.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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