I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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