the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
