What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Randomize
