I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
