walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
